This podcast seems like a great idea! I wish I’d discovered it sooner!
Category: English
Tick Tock, Tick Tock
I’m counting down the hours now. My exam is tomorrow morning. I’m wondering what I can do to plug the biggest, most obvious holes in my language skills in the gaps between bouts of doing my day job. Aside from an hour talking to a friend via Skype, I’m thinking I should run through irregular verbs for half an hour or so, rehearse the answers to some of the key questions from the oral expression part of the exam and do some rounds of Memrise.
More importantly, tomorrow, I need to be up early and warm my brain up. I have noticed that if I speak Portuguese for a while it churns up the mud and sludge at the bottom of my brain and allows the words to float to the surface. The exam is at 10AM so I will need to try and cram in an hour of doing something difficult like writing a short essay or saying answers to questions out loud – actually producing language – or I’ll be stuffed when I get into the exam room.
The Portuguese embassy is only about 7 or 8 miles away so I could ride my bike there in the sunshine, but I think I’m going to go by train so I can rehearse my answers to the questions on there. So if you’re on the District Line tomorrow and there’s some bloke telling everyone, in a loud, clear voice that “Tenho dois irmãos. Sou o mais velho. O meu irmão do meio vai casar este verão…” that’ll be me.
Hashtagging in Portuguese
I got retweets for this. Actual retweets!
The hashtag game was inspired by a news story about a Portuguese spy who was caught flogging state secrets to the Russians in the latest bout of eighties nostalgia. People were understandably curious about what the Russians could actually want but I can’t pretend I understood all the suggestions, especially where they related to politicians.
Et Tu Memrise?
As I said earlier…
It’s just so pointless. You open the app and there’s this great picture background but you just think “what? I want to learn vocabulary not have to think how to get from here to my course list, you nitwits!
O Patio Das Cantigas
I watched the remake of the 1942 classic today. Why? Why did I bother? As far as I can tell, it’s not as funny and not as easy to understand as the original. If you’re considering it, save your money and watch the real thing on Youtube.
The DVD doesn’t have Portuguese subtitles, only English ones. The youtube video has Portuguese subtitles but (my sources inform me) they’re not very accurate. It looked like a much better film though: Better acting, not trying as hard, and they talk at a more manageable pace. I’ll do it properly next time.
As Cartas
Letters are right at the end of the textbook I’m using but they come up in some of the mock exams I’ve looked at so I thought I’d better get familiar with them
1 – Formal
Londres 20 de Maio de 2016
João Imaginário
Faculdade de Letras da Universidade de Lisboa
Alameda da Universidade
1600-214 Lisboa
PortugalExcelentíssimo Senhor
Desculpa de não ter escrito mais cedo. Tive dores nos dedos por causa de tocar demasiado o violão e por isso não pude usar o teclado.
Fiquei espantado e encantado ao receber a sua oferta de tornar-me Professor de Português. Depois de muita consideração, acho que devo recusá-la neste momento porque preciso de mais pratica. Pode ser no próximo ano?Obrigado outra vez
Os melhores cumprimentos
18ck
2 – Informal
Londres 20 de Maio de 2016
Caro Jose
Obrigado pelo livro que enviou-me para o meu aniversário. Não tenho lido livros de China Mievile, mas gosto muito de ficção científica e ouvi que é um escritor interessante. Estou contente por saber que a sua equipa ganhou o tri campeonato, seja lá o que isso for.
Um abraço
18ck
So it looks like Caro is the rule for starting letters in informal situations and Excelentíssimo (or “Exmo”) for formal. I have also seen “Prezado” (“esteemed”) but I believe that’s more of a Brazilian thing.
The sender’s address only seems to be the town and date in the format shown. Recipient addresses have the format:
[Recipient Name] [Housename] (optional) [Streetname] [Streetnumber] [Locality] [7 digits] [TOWN] [PORTUGAL] (if posting internationally)
Endings seem to be “os melhores cumprimentos”, “Atentamente”, or further down the scale of formality, “um abraço” (seems to be common between men) or something with beijo or beijinho.
Formal letters also seem to use v/ for Vosso and n/ for Nosso. I haven’t seen these anywhere except on the formal letter sample in Lathrop and Dias, which is sort of weird.
Um… The… Um… Exam…
Just eight days now. It’s scary! I’ve been having extra lessons to raise my spoken language game from “horrifying” to merely “awful”. One of the things I’ve found helpful is Amolto Call Recorder for Skype. I’ve been using it to record my calls so I can listen to them later and get a second shot at my teacher’s wisdom (with her permission of course!)
Unfortunately, the results have been a little demoralising. I can’t believe how much time I spend just saying “Ummmm”.
So… there’s a long way to go.
Small-Talk Charades
Here at Luso HQ, we are big fans of a game called DipSticks. The game consists of a set of thin, cardboard strips with a question on each side. Contestants draw out a stick and have to perform a charade or some other task. Whoever answers correctly gets to keep the stick.
Now, there are only eight days left until the exam (*cue sound of screaming*) and I was trying to think of ways to cram in as much spoken Portuguese as I possibly can, so I hit on the idea of making my own DipSticks, but with Portuguese questions instead of charades. Each one has the same question each side, with one written in the “tu” form and one in the você form. My daughter is quite into the idea, which I like because, well, really anything that gets her learning about language is a plus in my book. The categories are loosely based on the “pontos de orientação” from the “Contatos Sociais” section of an old DEPLE paper published by TELC that I have somehow (how? I can’t remember) got hold of, so hopefully these are the kinds of questions that are likely to come up in the real exam.
The idea is that m’daughter will pick a card and read it out, possibly with some help, and I will try and give an answer at the drop of a hat. If I get a plausible answer with minimal umming and ahhing, and my pronunciation is close enough to at least not be misunderstood, then I win. If not, no stick for me.
You can download them as an excel file here if you’re interested. Just print them out on some nice thick printer paper (I used the same coated paper I use for printing photographs, but I’m sure some decent chunky CV paper would do the job just as well) , fold it in half along the centre line, glue the two sides together and cut them into sticks. They fit nicely into these funny little glasses somebody gave us, as you can see. A shot glass or even an egg cup would probably work just as well though.
Latest News From The Humour Lab
Following on from the last one…
“An optimist is a person who, if he falls off the top of a building would wave through every window and say “doing all right so far!”
This is a bit of a cheat since it’s just a straight translation of an english joke but I like how it sounds anyway.
Portuguese Somersault
Eastbourne doesn’t have much to recommend it but it has – or had when I lived there, anyway – an absolute jewel of a bookshop. It was a massive, sprawling affair with three floors and no recognisable system. Sometimes there was a parrot upstairs. And it was there that I first came across a book called “Portuguese Somersault” by Jan and Cora Gordon. I’d never heard of it before and I haven’t heard much of them since, either. To my surprise, though, they are still known today, and there’s a chap who has taken the time to curate a fan site, with biographical details and more about their various travel writings, which you can find at janandcoragordon.co.uk.
The book is actually two books, written in 1926 and 1933, detailing their travels in the country. They are reflective travellers who took the trouble to learn something of the language and to investigate their own preconceptions of the country. Along the way, they made sketches, and these are scattered throughout the chapters as illustrations. Here, for example, is a fish seller blowing into his fish to make them look bigger so he can get a better price. Cool eh?

I read it yonks ago and can’t actually remember a whole lot of it, to be honest. Maybe it’s due for a re-read. What I do know is that the “Somersault” of the title is a reference to the dramatic change in the country between the two visits. 1926 was the year of the coup that overthrew the Primeira República Portuguesa and established a dictatorship which, by 1933, when they returned, had become known as the Estado Novo (New State), led by António de Oliveira Salazar.
One small, dark detail stuck in my mind that gave me a little premonitory shudder: On page 75, they meet a Portuguese girl who had been separated from her parents during the Great War and left with relatives in Germany. Growing up, she believed herself to be German. When she was finally reunited with her parents, ten years later, she was pleased of course, but it came as a huge shock to her to find that she wasn’t a German at all. What a jolt that must have been to a girl who felt herself to have a “German Soul”. Now, at the age of seventeen, she would have less freedom than before. Worse, she would have to marry a Portuguese man who wouldn’t even understand her German love. Well, I think we can all see how this sort of cultural dislocation would be a shock to anyone. What I thought was telling, though, was when she describes her disappointment at finding out that she wasn’t who she thought she was:
“They want me to be a nice Portuguese girl but I can’t because, you see, I’ve been brought up as a German girl, and I was taught in the school that the Germans are the higher race, aren’t they? Do you see that?”
Jan and Cora note this as a minor personal tragedy but don’t comment on the idea that Germans are teaching children to feel themselves superior to everyone else. And this just ten years from German bombs falling on neighbouring Spain at the start of the Civil War, thirteen years from the start of the Second World War. The Salazar government was neutral in both, but gave military and logistical support to the Nationalist (and German) side in Spain and was broadly sympathetic to Hitler, only staying out of World War Two because of long-standing alliances with Britain.
Well, it’s easy for me, with the benefit of hindsight, to read more into this incident than the Gordons did. I certainly don’t mean to suggest that they should have seen the future in that one little tale, but I thought it was a fascinating little glimpse into what was happening under the surface of Europe in the inter-war years.