Category: English

Posted in English, Portuguese

It’s a Joke But it’s Also Homework

Posted on by Colin Lusk

(Update: corrected version here)

I hope I can quote a whole article here under… what? Fair use? It’s Manuel Cardoso, writing in the Expresso under the headline “Os portugueses lêm bem” and I’m not stealing it, I’m fixing it because – unless I am making a massive idiot of myself by misunderstanding, he has deliberately put lots of errors in it, and that’s the joke. Even the title has an error in it. It should say “lêem”, not “lêm”. What’s really interesting about this is that most of these are the kinds of mistakes a native speaker would make, and they are usually different from the mistakes we made as learners. They are mistakes you make when you’ve learned a language by listening instead of by studying books.

Anyway this is a learning blog so I’m going to use it as an exercise and try to fix it. I WILL DEFINITELY GET A LOT WRONG so rather than erase the original text, I will put what I think are the right answers in the footnotes and then if any other students are reading this you can play along and see if you get the same answers as me, and, if not, tell me about it in the comments!

Segundo a OCDE, a literacia dos adultos do nosso país está abaixo da média. Talvez póssamos(1) refletir um pouco sobre o assunto. Dizer(2) que não confio nada nestes resultados. Houveram(3) pessoas a afirmar que não ficaram surpreendidas, mas eu fiquei perplexo. Na minha opinião pessoal, os portugueses têm excelentes capacidades de interpretação de texto. Acreditaria neste estudo se tivesse sido feito à(4) cinquenta anos atrás, mas a verdade é que, nas últimas décadas, avançámos muito para a frente(5).

Julgo que tudo isto é muito suspeito, porque o esforço para aumentar a literacia em Portugal tem partido(6) de ambos os dois lados políticos. Este atual governo até já interviram no sentido de(7) resolver os problemas de fundo da educação. Certamente que a OCDE vai retratar-se(8): os resultados devem estar errados, derivado a erros. Caso contrário, não vejo outra alternativa senão sair para fora dessa organização. Se tivesse nas minhas mãos, eu faria-o(9).

É óbvio que a divulgação deste estudo causou mau-estar(10). Esta notícia estragou-me o dia, que até estava solarengo(11). Não tenham dúvidas: condeno veemente(12) a postura da OCDE. É ofensivo que um organismo(13) internacional trate os cidadões(14) portugueses como uns analfabetos quaisqueres(15). Aonde(16) fica a dignidade? A mim, pessoalmente, admira-me que isto não tenha despoletado manifestações. Para receber resultados como estes, para a próxima nem vale a pena partilhar os dados. Hades(17) cá vir, OCDE.

Não nego, há pequenos pormenores a afinar. No que toca à avaliação dos alunos, temos de subir para cima os indicadores(18). Por exemplo, os exames de matemática deste ano podiam ter corrido mais bem(19): não houve poucas(20) notas negativas. De facto, dá vontade de perguntar uma questão aos nossos estudantes: o que é que fizes-te(21) no ano lectivo(22) passado? Em todo o caso, temos concerteza(23) capacidade para inverter esta situação e sair deste ciclo vicioso(24). Confiem, OCDE: a gente vamos(25) dar a volta a isto.

(1) possamos doesn’t need an accent

(2) I think he means “diz-se”

(3) Looks like the wrong tense. Educated guess would be that he means “Haverão”

(4) Should be há. The “atrás” later in the sentence is redundant too, I think

(5) Hmmm…. this looks fishy too. Avançar implies the frente so that seems redundant, and “para” instead of “em” seems surprising so I think this is another mistake

(6) Tem partido can’t be right but I’m not sure what it’s meant to be

(7) Not a grammar error, I think but seems like a misuse of the expression “In the sense of”. It gets misused a lot in english too.

(8) They’re going to draw a portrait of themselves? Unlikely. I think the verb should be retrair.

(9) Looks like we’re in mesoclise territory: Fá-lo-ia

(10) Mal-estar

(11) I’m starting to get paranoid and feel like I’m missing loads. I don’t quite know what the joke is here but this is such an odd word that it has to be a wrong. I know it can mean sunny, but its just not a word I’ve heard before so I smell shenanigans.

(12) Ha! It hadn’t really occurred to me but although veemente is an adjective, the presence of the “-mente” at the end makes it look like an adverb. It should be veementemente! Vehemently.

(13) Organização, presumably

(14) Cidadãos

(15) Popular general knowledge quiz answer, which is the only word in the language that is pluralised in the middle, not the end, quaisquer, not quaisqueres!

(16) Just onde

(17) Getting a bit lost here. I know it’s quite common that people write “há-des” instead of “hás-de” but I haven’t seen it without an apostrophe so maybe he really means Hades is coming. The sentence immediately before this one seems impenetrable and I feel like there’s something wrong with it but I don’t know what

(18) So it looks like the indicators/standards have to go up but he starts off saying “we have to go up…” so I think maybe it’s just that the verb doesn’t match what I take as being the subject of the verb…?

(19) Melhor

(20) There weren’t few… seems like a double negative, no?

(21) Fizeste.

(22) Looks like a pre-AO spelling

(23) Com certeza

(24) The expression is “Circulo vicioso” not “ciclo vicioso”

(25) A gente takes third person singular verb endings: a gente vai, no vamos

Posted in English, Portuguese

Se Dançar é Só Depois

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Ana Lua Caiano is coming to London for a gig in May with another musician, Baby Volcano. BV seems to do a lot of songs in english and even (shudder) Spanish, so I might need to bring earplugs for that one. Is this any good though? Let’s have a listen, translate it, and decide…

Se dançar é só depois Para já, já estou morta
Morta para ir dormir Dormir p’ra amanhã voltar
Voltar a acordar
Com ideias mal cozidas Mal cozidas p’ra empratar
Numa folha de papel
Ai, ai, ai eu
Acordei feita num oito Dormi com os pés no chão
Para ser mais fácil levantar
Ai, ai, ai eu
Nunca cortes meus delírios
Quero esquecer minha farda P’ra não ir mais trabalhar
Ai, meu amor		If I dance, it’ll only be later. I’m dead at the moment
Dead to sleep, to sleep to come back tomorrow
To wake again
With half-cooked ideas, half cooked to plate up
On a piece of paper
Ai ai ai I
Woke up in a mess*, I slept with my feet on the ground
To make it easier to get up
Ai ai ai, I
never cut my delirium
I want t forget my uniform so I’ll never have to work
Ai, my darling
Quando nós vivermos juntos Ai, meu amor
Quando o quarto for p’ra dois
Ai, espera-me à noite, amor, Espera-me à noite
De dia nunca tenho
Tempo p’ra dançar
E se dançar tem que ser Devagarinho
E se dançar tem que ser Bem devagar
Ai, porque o meu corpo, amor, E o teu corpo
Nossos corpos
Já só sabem maquinar
Se dançar é só depois Para já, já estou morta
Morta para ir dormir Dormir p’ra amanhã voltar
Voltar a acordar
Com ideias mal cozidas Mal cozidas p’ra empratar
Numa folha de papel
Ai, ai, ai eu
Ai, a sorte não me encontra
Pensa que já estou morta
Guarda meu ouro p’ra outro
Ai, ai, ai eu
Os meus pés acordam frios Minhas mãos a encolher
A sorte não dá de comer
Ai, meu amor		When we live together Ai my darling
When the bedroom is for two
Ai, wait for me at night, love, wait for me at night
In the daytime I don’t have
Time to dance
And if I dance it has to be slowly
And if I dance it has to be really slow
AI, because my body, love, and your body
Our bodies
Only know how to be machines
If I dance, it’ll only be later. I’m dead at the moment
Dead to sleep, to sleep to come back tomorrow
To wake again
With half-cooked ideas, half cooked to plate up
On a piece of paper
Ai ai ai I
Ai, luck can’t find me
It thinks I’m dead already
It keeps my gold for someone else
AI ai ai, I
My feet wake up cold, my hands clenching
Luck doesn’t feed me
Ai, my love
Se conseguirmos viver juntos Ai, meu amor
Se o meu quarto aumentar
Ai, espera-me à noite, amor, Espera-me à noite
Continuo sem ter
Tempo p’ra dançar
Se dançar é só depois Para já, já estou morta
Morta para ir dormir Dormir p’ra amanhã voltar
Voltar a acordar
Com ideias mal cozidas Mal cozidas p’ra empratar
Numa folha de papel
Ai, ai, ai eu
Acordei feita num oito
Dormi com os pés no chão P’ra ser mais fácil levantar
Ai, ai, ai eu
Nunca cortes meus delírios
Quero esquecer minha farda P’ra não ir mais trabalhar
Ai, ai, ai eu
Acordei feita num oito
Dormi com os pés no chão P’ra ser mais fácil levantar
Ai, ai, ai eu
Nunca cortes meus delírios
Quero esquecer minha farda
Quero ir mas é dançar		If we manage to live together, ai my love
If my bedroom gets bigger
Ai, wait for me at night, love, wait for me at night
I still don’t have
Time to dance
If I dance, it’ll only be later. I’m dead at the moment
Dead to sleep, to sleep to come back tomorrow
To wake again
With half-cooked ideas, half cooked to plate up
On a piece of paper
Ai ai ai I
Woke up in a mess*, I slept with my feet on the ground
To make it easier to get up
Ai ai ai, I
Never cut my delirium
I want t forget my uniform so I’ll never have to work
Ai ai ai I
Woke up in a mess*, I slept with my feet on the ground
To make it easier to get up
Ai ai ai, I
Never cut my delirium
I want t forget my uniform
I just want to go dancing

* Feito num oito seems not to mean you’re not literally in a figure eight, you’re just tired, listless, messed up, like feito ao bife.

Hm, I’m afraid that just left me cold. It didn’t really have anything to recommend it at all. I might go anyway because I like going to portuguese shows but I have to admit it’s not something that excites me, so… I dunno.

Posted in English

Correct Accent Opinion

Posted on by Colin Lusk

(Hee hee – no offence to all my lovely Brazilian friends, but when it comes to accents, I know where my allegiances lie!)

I actually saw this a couple of days ago and considered posting it here but realised at the last minute that the account that had posted it was some CHEGA chud, so I’m glad to see it pop up again on a pure humour account so I can share it without promoting idiots.

Posted in English

Sporting Dragons and Badly-Parked Wagons

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Intrigued by this comment on Reddit

Em dias de jogo no dragão o pessoal estaciona na entrada e saída da VCI. O defeito é que a polícia não multa.

Jogo no dragão? VCI?

It turned out to be pretty boring. They aren’t recreating the Dragon Challenge from the Tri-Wizard Tournament in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, O Estádio do Dragão is just the name of the ground where Futebol Clube do Porto is based. And a VCI? A Via de Cintura Interna – The inner ring road.

Not the most exciting bit of research ever, but always nice to know these little things.

Posted in English

Corrections. And a Robin.

Posted on by Colin Lusk

If you read the post this morning, I think there were a couple of errors so I’ve added a lot of notes (in English because I’m exhausted) at the bottom, so if you’re hungry for more, go back and have a look!

I made a video today. It’s going to take some editing. I was out at the allotment and nobody was about but I expect the people who go into the bushes nearby for a crafty wee were confused to hear a ghostly voice talking in Portuguese followed by “oh for fuck’s sake” and then repeating the same thing, over and over again as I stumbled over words.

I kept saying “nesta estação…” but it kept coming in out as netestastão. I’d never thought of it as a trava-Língua but… Ugh.

Meanwhile, this lad took advantage of my distraction to ransack the greenhouse for stray seeds.

Quick vocabulary test: how do you say Robin in Portuguese? No, I couldn’t remember either. I had to look it up. Pisco-de-peito-ruivo.

Posted in English

Discounts 👀

Posted on by Colin Lusk

In case anyone has been on the fence about signing up for Practice Portuguese, the lads are having a sale so you can get it for a reduced price by clicking their link.

Well, this is what my cellphone app came up with as an illustration… I didn’t specify it had to have an extra hand, but I have to admit it would be useful on this situation.
Posted in English

This is Definitely an Important Use of Technology

Posted on by Colin Lusk

My phone’s latest update has a built-in AI art generator so I don’t have to faff about online making pics using a third party website. My phone settings are all in Portuguese though, so I have to give it instructions in Portuguese too. Good practice for speaking clearly!

The only limitation I’ve found so far is it refuses to draw people. That’s OK, I only like ducks at the moment.

Posted in English

Special Delivery

Posted on by Colin Lusk

I asked a question in reddit about the word “deliver”, specifically in the context of birth, and although the answer was pretty simple, it opened up a rabbit-hole that went pretty deep!

In English we use deliver to mean two different things, but you wouldn’t use the standard verb to deliver (“entregar”) for either of them. Firstly, deliver is what the mother does. Well that’s easy. We have a choice of verbs – parir, or the beautiful “dar à luz”. And secondly, we also use deliver to describe what the medical professional does, whether it be the doctor (médico of course) or the midwife (parteira). And this is the bit I realised I was stuck on: how do you say “the doctor delivered a baby.

A few people misunderstood the question and said it should be parir. O médico pariu? Um… No.

But the root of the problem of course is that there just isn’t a verb for it. It’s just a weirdness of English that we use the same verb for both. Instead, you’d have to use “assistir ao parto” or “realizar o parto”, relegating the doctor to more of an ancillary role, rather than letting him or her take all the glory from the mother by claiming to have “delivered” the baby. Well, that seems like a good thing to me.

And of course, just to complete the picture, Portuguese give a more active role to the baby. Babies don’t passively get born (ser nascido???) the verb is “nascer”, actively, as if it was something they did by themselves.

But there’s more! And I’ll tell you about it after this gif.

Come to think of it, theres a third use of “deliver” for babies isn’t there… Oh never mind!

Firstly, “assistir ao parto” seems to be a relatively rare use of the verb “assistir” in a way that’s more familiar to English-speakers, since the doctor is assisting/helping, rather than just spectating, which is usually what assistir means in Portuguese (see here if you don’t know what I’m on about)

Secondly, the word “prenha” came up, meaning pregnant. I’d seen the verb “emprenhar” (impregnate) recently and wondered how prenha/emprenhar differed from grávida/engravidar. Prenha and emprenhar tend to be used more with animals. So if you’re a stock breeder, emprenhar is the verb for a cow becoming prenha, but I think your wife would not thank you for using those same words to announce that she is expecting.

While researching prenha in Priberam, I spotted a couple more interesting differences.

Firstly, let’s talk about the gender of the adjectives. Grávida exists in a masculine form, grávido, which is actually the default form of the adjective, however stupid that might be. Prenha, on the other hand doesn’t have a masculine form, prenho, but there is a synonym, prenhe, which ends in e and, as such, it wouldn’t change even if, by some miracle, a bull could get knocked up.

Secondly, there’s a difference in how the verbs are used: Emprenhar is defined as “Tornar ou ficar prenhe” (here) In other words, it means “get pregnant”, and applies only to what happens to the female. Engravidar, on the other hand, can mean both “tornar-se grávida” (get pregnant) or “Fazer ficar grávida” (impregnate) so it can be applied to the dad role just as easily as the mum role (here) .

That’s an awful lot of useful stuff from just one little question, don’t you think?