Posted in English, Portuguese

Cães de Loiça

Posted on by Colin Lusk

I heard this on Instagram and I was entranced, and had to hear the whole thing. The name of the band is Rouxinol Faduncho, which is like “Bad Fado Nightingale”, which sets expectations right from the start. Let’s see what the hell is going on in the lyrics.

(Ora o público pediu, e mais aderiu e até ganiu nesta campanha internacional e até europeia intitulada: Help Me a Pôr os Cães de Loiça a Sorrir a “Gane”. A gane quer dizer a sorrir a gane ou a ganir. tem sido,
Maravilhoso…)		Well, the public asked and even subscribed and even whined in this
International, and even european campaign entitled
Help me make china dogs smile a gane*. A gane means smile until whine or while howling. It has been marvelous.
Oi pra o sofrimento um bom remédio há afinal
Ajudem os cães de loiça, esse pobre animal
Ao vê-lo feroz no portão, eu sempre me comovo
Se a tinta cair ao chão, dou-lhe mais uma demão** e ele fica como novo		Hey, finally there’s a remedy for suffering
China dogs help, that poor animal
When I see them, ferocious at the gate, i always feel moved
If the paint falls on the flour, I’ll give it some more
One more coat and he’ll be good as new
Se gostas de animais, cães de loiça
Que não sujem os quintais, cães de loiça
São “bobbies” bestiais, cães de loiça
São cãezinhos mal tratados, de olhos esbugalhados e nada saltitões
Nunca se vão babar, nem ganir, nem ladrar, nem ferrar os ladrões		If you like animals, china dogs
That don’t dirty the garden, china dogs
They are beastly “bobbies”, china dogs
They are badly treated little dogs with googly eyes and not at all frisky
They never drool or whine or bark or injure burglars
Por serem portugueses e parecidos com o Toy
Que os restaurantes chineses não fazem deles “chopsói”
Não largam pelos ou pena, nunca roem os sofás
Reparem bem nesta cena, são estrelas de cinema
Cento e um Dalmatás		Because they are Portuguese, and look like Toy
Because chinese restaurants don’t turn them into chop suey***
They don’t drop hairs or feathers, they never chew sofas
Pay attention to this scene, they are stars of cinema
101 Dalmatians
Se gostas de animais, cães de loiça
Que não sujem os quintais, cães de loiça
São “bobbies” bestiais, cães de loiça
São cãezinhos mal tratados, de olhos esbugalhados e nada saltitões
Nunca se vão babar, nem ganir, nem ladrar, nem ferrar os ladrões		If you like animals, china dogs
That don’t dirty the garden, china dogs
They are beastly “bobbies”, china dogs
They are badly treated little dogs with googly eyes and not at all frisky
They never drool or whine or bark or injure burglars
(Aquilo é uma maravilha, aquilo corre corre… é uma companhia… pfff! e aquilo tem que se fazer, tem que se levar um saquinho sempre para apanhar os cócós
Depois… Há que manter… que isto da camada do ozoto está a acabar, não é? temos que manter isto… planeta limpo… mas são muito engraça… e fofos? ui!)		That’s amazing, it runs… it’s company… pff!! And you know what you have to do, you have to bring a little bag with you every time to hold its poo afterwards, you have to maintain… because of this thing about the ozogen**** layer disappearing, right? We have to keep this planet clean, but they are very funny… and cute? Ui!
Se gostas de animais, cães de loiça
Que não sujem os quintais, cães de loiça
São “bobbies” bestiais, cães de loiça
São cãezinhos mal tratados, de olhos esbugalhados e nada saltitões
Nunca se vão babar, nem ganir, nem ladrar, nem ferrar os ladrões		If you like animals, china dogs
That don’t dirty the garden, china dogs
They are beastly “bobbies”, china dogs
They are badly treated little dogs with googly eyes and not at all frisky
They never drool or whine or bark or injure burglars

*I actually googled “sorrir a gane”, but I’m pretty sure this is a pun. The name of the campaign starts with “help me” so I guess “a gane” is meant to sound like “again”. Help me make the dogs smile again, where “gane” is the third person singular of the verb “ganir” – to whine. I went and looked at the release date, confidently expecting it would be in or after 2016, so playing on a certain well-known catch-phrase of that absolute fuckwit the Americans have elected to pretend to be a president and plunge themselves further into decline. But no – it was released in 2007, so they obviously just hit on a pun that would become much more topical and more depressing 9 years later.

** Wow, I was sure this was a typo in the lyrics and it should be “de mão” (ie, he’s painting it by hand) but no, uma demão is a coat of paint or a retouch.

***😬

****I think the original “ozoto” is a deliberate mistake, mixing Ozono (ozone) and Azoto (nitrogen) so I have translated it in the same way.

Posted in English, Portuguese

Witches! Part 6

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Este blogue é o último da série sobre as bruxas de Portugal que começou aqui.

Ai, Jesús, o pior fica para o final… Segundo a Insta de Lola, “durante o século XX, em Aljezur, no Algarve, “mulheres de virtude” praticavam rituais de proteção e feitiçaria e muitos contos populares rel1ata eventos misteriosos na região”. Soa bem, não soa? Mais uma história de mulheres de boa vontade a viver em harmonia com a natureza que acabou mal-entendidas pela patriarquia, certo?

Ui… Nem por isso. Quando pesquisei BRUXA e ALJEZUR, o todos os resultados tiveram como assunto uma notícia de Maio de 1929 de Vidigal, uma vila perto de Alzejur. Os habitantes daquele lugar costumava de participar em “bailes”, onde não havia música mas sim uma poção alucinógena. Sob influência deste liquido, dançavam e participavam em atos de feiticeira incluindo um incidente no qual um gato, que a gente achava era possuído por um espírito maligno*, entrou na sala portanto alguém pegou nele e cortou-lhe as patas, As autoridade religiosas queixaram às autoridades civis, que prenderam cinco pessoas em Abril de 1929 mas. após umas semanas. os detidos, já soltos, foram convidados a mais uma baile.

If JK Rowling’s books were more realistic

E foi naquela baile, em Monte Velho, nos arredores de Vidiga, que um deles, Luís Tomé, matou a sua mulher, Adriana Marreiros, de machadada. Estava grávida de quatro meses. A mãe dela, Maria Marreiros tentou salvar-lhe a vida mas a intervenção costou-a a vida. Foi espancado até à morte pelo genro. A filha do Luís e da Adriana, que se chamava Custódia, estava escondido debaixo da cama. Viu tudo e (como é óbvio) recusou de sair. O pai lhe implorou e até encheu um copo com o sangue das mulheres, com qual pintou símbolos no seu próprio peito e bebeu o resto.

O pai foi detido e enforcou-se na cadeia. Bem feito. A filha, cujo terror mal podemos imaginar, não saiu e não morreu, e a filha dela finalmente contou a história da sua mãe aos jornais em 2018, quase um século depois.

E a bruxa? A mulher que organizou as bailes foi Maria Inácia Costa, visto pelos analfabetos daquela zona com uma mulher de virtude. porque sabia ler. Luís tinha a consultado e ela aconselhou´-lhe reunir a família toda porque a mulher tinha traído a bruxa e “era necessário desfazer o enguiço”.

Lê a história completa aqui

English Version

This blog is the last in the series about the witches of Portugal that started here.

Oh, Jesus, I saved the worst for last… According to Lola’s Instagram, “during the 20th century, in Aljezur, in the Algarve, ‘virtuous women’ practiced protection rituals and witchcraft, and many folk tales recount mysterious events in the region.” Sounds good, doesn’t it? Another story of well-meaning women living in harmony with nature that ended up being misunderstood by the patriarchy, right?

Wow… Actually, no. When I searched for WITCH and ALJEZUR, all the results were about a news story from May 1929 about Vidigal, a village near Aljezur. The inhabitants of that place used to participate in “dances” where there was no music, but rather a hallucinogenic potion. Under the influence of this liquid, they danced and participated in acts of witchcraft, including an incident in which a cat, believed to be possessed by an evil spirit*, entered the room, so someone grabbed it and cut off its paws. The religious authorities complained to the civil authorities, who arrested five people in April 1929, but after a few weeks the detainees, now released, were invited to another dance.

And it was at this dance, in Monte Velho, on the outskirts of Vidiga, that one of them, Luís Tomé, killed his wife, Adriana Marreiros, with an axe. She was four months pregnant. Her mother, Maria Marreiros, tried to save her life, but the intervention cost her her own. She was beaten to death by her son-in-law. Luís and Adriana’s daughter, named Custódia, was hiding under the bed. She saw everything and (of course) refused to come out. Her father cajoled her and even filled a cup with the women’s blood, with which he painted symbols on his own chest and drank the leftovers. The father was arrested and hanged himself in prison. Good riddance. The daughter, whose terror we can scarcely imagine, stayed under the bed and didn’t die, and her daughter finally told her mother’s story to the newspapers in 2018, almost a century later.

And the witch? The woman who organized the dances was Maria Inácia Costa, seen by the illiterate people of that region as a “virtuous woman” because she could read. Luís had consulted her and she advised him to gather the whole family together because his wife had betrayed the witch and “it was necessary to undo the curse”.

You can read the full story here.

*This is the only part of the story not mentioned in the article I’ve cited but it is mentioned by Diário das Notícias, just so you know I didn’t make it up!

Posted in English, Portuguese

Witches! Part 5

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Este texto é o quinto sobre As Bruxas de Portugal. Veja o primeiro aqui se não te lembras o motivo

No Alentejo, a bruxa mais famosa é a Bruxa de Évora. Hoje em dia, a bruxa está mais conhecida no brasil do que na sua própria terra.

Assim como as outras mulheres descritas nesta série, a passagem de anos anda acrescentando mais camadas à lenda, mas é provável que esta feiticeira, que viveu na época de Dom Afonso Henriques, teve descendência árabe, portanto era também conhecida por “Moura Torta”. Como resultado da antiguidade, a lenda teve tempo o suficiente para crescer e para se enfeitar com novos boatos. Segundo as lendas, ela “fazia os portugueses se arrepiarem” com o seu poder. Falava árabe, português e latim e andou com um mocho no ombro; mandava demónios; voava montada não só numa vassoura mas também em animais como camelos, cães, e carneiros; tinha dois animais de estimação* – um bode e um gato, ambos pretos; era proficiente na magia dos árabes e dos célticos mas ainda por cima sabia ler e fazer matemática, que, no século XII, provavelmente parecia uma forma da magia! E há ainda mais! Em suma, era o Capitão Marvel da bruxaria portuguesa. A poder dela estava quase sem limites!

Convém lembrar que, naquela altura, os invasores árabes tinham sido afastados da terra portuguesa mas permaneceram na vizinhança, na Espanha. Numa época com pouca ciência pouca educação e a ameaça dum exercito ao outro lados das fronteiras, não e admira que havia tanto medo no ar, que acabou por se colar á figura da bruxa de Évora. Por isso, o mais surpreendente é que apesar de tudo a gente buscava a sua ajuda no amor, na vida e para curar doenças.

A Bruxa de Évora confronts one of the few kinds of animals she never dared ride.

English Translation

In the Alentejo region, the most famous sorceress is the Witch of Évora although nowadays, she is better known in Brazil than in her own country.

Like the other women described in this series, the passage of years has added more layers to the legend, but it is likely that this sorceress, who lived during the time of King Afonso Henriques, had Arab ancestry, therefore she was also known as “Moura Torta” (Crooked** Moor). As a result of its antiquity, the legend has had enough time to grow and be embellished with new rumours. According to legends, she “made the Portuguese shudder” with her power. She spoke Arabic, Portuguese, and Latin and walked with an owl on her shoulder; she commanded demons; she flew riding not only a broomstick but also animals such as camels, dogs, and sheep; she had two pets – a goat and a cat, both black; she was proficient in Arab and Celtic magic but also knew how to read and do mathematics, which, in the 12th century, probably seemed like a form of magic! And there’s more! In short, she was the Captain Marvel of Portuguese witchcraft. Her power was almost limitless!

It’s worth remembering that, at that time, the Arab invaders had been driven away from Portuguese territory but remained in the vicinity, in Spain. In a time with little science, little education, and the threat of an army on the other side of the borders, it’s no wonder that there was so much fear in the air, which ended up clinging to the figure of the witch of Évora. Therefore, the most surprising thing is that despite everything, people sought her help in love, in life, and to cure illnesses.

*I checked if the word “familiar” was used in the same way as it appears in english, to describe a witch’s guiding animal, but it seems not.

**Interesting point about translation here. Torto means crooked, but when applied to a person in english “crooked” usually means “dishonest” whereas in portuguese the equivalent, torto, can mean drunk, cross-eyed, disloyal, stubborn or rude. I sort of love the idea that the witch was just a drunk lady of arab heritage walking around shouting mad stuff and being believed by everyone, but my guess would be that it’s similar to the way it’s used in “Que Mulher É Essa” by A Garota Não, when she lists all the kinds of women who are excluded from certain high-status roles. 

A preta não entra 
A baixa não entra, não 
A velha não entra 
A torta não entra, não 
Quanto talento gasto em vão

So I think she’s talking about someone with a physical disability or deformity who is looked on as not meeting standards of beauty – but I am not 100% sure. This isn’t a super-original idea. a conventional reading of this would be that women with disabilities would be seen as witches because they were vulnerable and a liability and people wanted to push them out, say, so that they could inherit their house (Marxist interpretation) or because of misogyny (feminist interpretation) or to maintain the invisible power structures within society (postmodern toss interpretation) or because she understood that with very little ability to defend herself physically, cultivating an image of being a powerful ally of the devil is a good way of assuring nobody messes with you in a society where there’s no real rule of law (interpretation I am currently working up into a film script to pitch to Pixar).

Posted in English, Portuguese

Witches! Part 4

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Hoje, passamos pela região de Estremadura. Mas afinal, onde fica Estremadura? Porque já não existe na mapa. Estremadura é um território histórico que abrange os atuais zonas de Setúbal, Santarém e Lisboa, que (como a Lola Ramos afirmou) a sede da inquisição que perseguiu tanto as assim chamado “bruxas” quanto hereges, e acima de tudo Judeus.

A Bruxa da Arruda é uma das feiticeiras mais famosas nesta série, a lenda dela fornecendo não só uma atração turística mas também assunto de vários livros (um brasileiro e um português por exemplo) mas o que mais me surpreendeu é quão moderna é a história. A “bruxa”, Ana Loura era ativa durante os finais do século XIX e os primeiros anos do XX e praticou artes comuns a mulheres da sua profissão “curar pessoas e adivinhar coisas”. Deste modo de vida, a questão não está em causa mas ao longo dos anos mais lendas e mais boatos foram acrescentados á história verdadeira. Ela fez sair uma cobra da boca de um rapaz atormentado por doenças misteriosas, por exemplo.

Segundo um livro publicado em 1905, “A bruxa da Arruda, —A celebre bruxa costuma visitar a Ericeira por fins de setembro. É muito respeitada; dizem que é rica, a pobres não leva nada; apresenta-se com muitos ouros. Tem uma filha que já entende de moléstias. Em geral leva 300 reis pela consulta. Receita quasi sempre esfregas de aguardente e papas de pão de milho ralado. Mas isto varia em quantidade, tempo, calor, e no sítio do corpo. Ouvi também chamar-lhe a mulher do Casal das Neves, no termo da Arruda dos Vinhos. Nem precisa ver o doente, levam-lhe roupa do uso do enfermo, uma camisa ou camisola, e ela pelo cheiro conhece a moléstia e logo receita. Costuma pousar numa casa do norte da vila, e a sua chegada consta logo entre a pobre gente que a venera e teme.Já teve questões com padres e médicos, já foi aos tribunais, me disse alguém, e ficou sempre victoriosa!” (Pereira, G. A Villa da Ericeira citado nesta página)

Fico admirado por ouvir que uma bruxa andava ativa, abertamente, sob os olhos da igreja até no século XX!

English Translation

Today, we’re passing through the Estremadura region. But where exactly is Estremadura? Because it no longer exists on the map. Estremadura is a historical territory encompassing the current areas of Setúbal, Santarém, and Lisbon, which (as Lola Ramos stated) was the seat of the Inquisition that persecuted both so-called “witches” and heretics, and above all, Jews.

The Witch of Arruda is one of the most famous sorceresses in this series, her legend providing not only a tourist attraction but also the subject of several books (one Brazilian and one Portuguese, for example). But what surprised me most is how modern the story is. The “witch,” Ana Loura, was active during the late 19th century and early 20th century and practiced arts common to women of her profession: “healing people and divination.” That she chose this way of life is not disputed, but over the years more legends and rumours have been added to the true story. She made a snake come out of the mouth of a boy tormented by mysterious illnesses, for example.

According to a book published in 1905, “The Witch of Arruda—The famous witch usually visits Ericeira at the end of September. She is highly respected; they say she is rich, she takes nothing from the poor; she presents herself with many gold coins. She has a daughter who already understands illnesses. She generally charges 300 reis for a consultation. She almost always prescribes rubs of brandy and porridges of grated cornbread. But this varies in quantity, time, heat, and the location on the body. I also heard her called the woman of Casal das Neves, in the Arruda dos Vinhos area. She doesn’t even need to see the sick person; they bring her the sick person’s clothes, a shirt or sweater, and she recognizes the illness by the smell and immediately prescribes something. She usually stays in a house in the north of the village, and her arrival is immediately announced among the poor people who venerate and fear her. She has had disputes with priests and doctors, she has gone to court, someone told me, and she has always been victorious!” (Pereira, G. A Villa da Ericeira)

I am amazed to hear that a witch was active, openly, under the eyes of the church even in the 20th century!

Posted in English, Portuguese

Witches! Part 3

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Ando a negligenciar este blogue e por isso a minha série sobre as bruxas de Portugal perdeu o seu dinamismo. As bruxas escaparam, e torna-se difícil seguir-lhes o rasto. Mas estou de volta com o meu nariz pronto para cheirar as feiticeiras todas. Hoje investigamos a aldeia de Proença-a-Nova na Beira.

Segundo a lenda, havia naquela zona uma viúva atraente que casou com um sapateiro. De vez em quando, nas noites de lua cheia, ela levava ao marido um chá quente, e ao beber, o marido adormeceu, caindo num sono profundo. O sapateiro ficou curioso e, uma noite dessas, não bebeu o chá. Após algum tempo, viu a sua esposa a ungir o corpo dela com ervas e óleo. Depois, abriu a janela e, cantando “Voa voa por cima de toda a folha”, começou a voar pelo ar. O marido, querendo segui-la, esfregou o seu corpo com o mesmo óleo e as mesmas ervas. Entoou as palavras mágicas mas não tinha poder igual à da esposa e acabou no chão, arranhado e machucado. Nunca voltou a falar daquela noite e passou a beber sempre o chá como ela mandou.  

English Version

I’ve been neglecting this blog, and that’s why my series on the witches of Portugal has lost its momentum. The witches have escaped, and it’s difficult to track them down. But I’m back with my nose ready to sniff out all the witches. Today we investigate the village of Proença-a-Nova in Beira.

According to legend, there was an attractive widow in that area who married a shoemaker. From time to time, on nights when the moon was full, she would bring her husband hot tea, and upon drinking it, he would fall into a deep sleep. The shoemaker became curious and, one night, only pretended to drink the tea. After some time, he saw his wife anointing her body with herbs and oil. So he opened the window and, chanting “Fly fly over every leaf,” began to fly through the air. The husband, wanting to follow her, rubbed his body with the same oil and herbs. He chanted the magic words but he didn’t have his wife’s power, so he ended up on the ground, scratched and bruised. He never spoke of that night again and from then on, always drank the tea as she had instructed.

Posted in Portuguese

Natais – Contos e Narrativas de João dos Reis Gomes

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Desisti de ler este livro porque ler contos natalícios após o natal é deprimente, mas acho que irei voltar à carga em Dezembro de 2026, e já tenho suficiente do sabor da leitura para escrever uma opinião.

João Reis de Gomes era um madeirense que escreveu vários contos e retratos do natal na ilha. Alguns têm temas religiosos, outros exemplificam a tendência por parte dos leitores verem a festa como uma estação de nostalgia. 

And if that sounds interesting, you can get a copy here, or score an amazing antiquarian version here.

Posted in Portuguese

“Os Passos Em Volta” de Herberto Helder

Posted on by Colin Lusk
Os Passod em Volta de Herberto Helder

Já escrevi um texto sobre um conto desta coleção há algum tempo, porque eu tive de ler o “teorema” como prate do curso sobre a cultura e a literatura portuguesa. O docente explicou o contexto da história (O protagonista é um dos assassinos de Inês de Castro). Adorei tanto que decidi ler os restantes histórias. Infelizmente, sem um professor para explicar, a experiência foi menos satisfatória… 

O autor é madeirense, e a minha esposa já teve o livro na estante mas quando o mencionei no Insta alguém me chamou de erudito porque tem a reputação de ser uma leitura difícil. Podes crer, mas ainda assim, estou muito contente por ter lido e entendido um dos contos!

Posted in English

O Grão Caudilho

Posted on by Colin Lusk

I was a briefly stumped by this. Grão means grain, normally, and caudilho looks familiar but looks like it ought to be something to do with a tail (cauda). It’s a set phrase though. Caudilho is actually descended from Spanish word meaning the chief, the head man, the dictator. So grão caudilho means… The grain chief? No, grão has a hidden secret meaning, if you scroll down a bit on its priberam page, it can be an adjective, where it’s just a form of “grande”. It’s the masculine form of Grã, as in Grã-Bretanha. So grão caudilho = the big boss, the big cheese.

Posted in English

Sete-Estalos and Surprising Suffixes

Posted on by Colin Lusk

Reading “Natais – Contos e Narrativas” by João dos Reis Gomes and came across this phrase that seems to be unknown on the Web.

It’s just some sort of firecracker or cap that goes bang when you throw it on the ground though, according to my wife. Some sort of party snap or cap bomb, I suppose. Do they even make those any more? I haven’t seen anything like it for a while.

The book is quite challenging because it has a lot of unusual words and madeiran regionalisms. One of the new words that struck me was “indelével”.

Very obvious what that means but I don’t think I’ve come across it before and it’s surprising because I’m pretty sure I haven’t seen a word ending in “ével”. Of someone had asked me to guess how to say indelible I would have had it ending in “ível”, for sure.

Hm, I seem to be blogging in English again. Lazy.