Posted in English

I Find Myself…

I find myself strangely embarrassed to talk to Portuguese people. A couple of friends have skyped me and asked how I feel about the referendum. I couldn’t really tell them though because I was too drunk to remember how to say “ashamed of living in a country that is 52% idiots” in Portuguese.

One of the people I follow on twitter put it like this:

It means “Have any English people tried to swim to Europe yet? Don’t let them come in. We have to protect our jobs“, and I know what he means. If I was from the mainland I wouldn’t want to speak to us either.

Posted in English

24 June 2016

In keeping with yesterday’s historic Brexit vote, I have decided instead of learning Portuguese I’m just going to speak loudly and clearly to foreigners: “Don’t you speak English?” I will shout as I order my tea and crumpets.